


Don't Let Go

by muntedvoid, RatKingDad



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, James is stinky, Maria Reynolds deserved better, Modern AU, Susan is an absolute child, description of injury
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-23
Updated: 2020-08-22
Packaged: 2021-03-01 22:46:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,389
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23804827
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/muntedvoid/pseuds/muntedvoid, https://archiveofourown.org/users/RatKingDad/pseuds/RatKingDad
Summary: Eliza approaches her husband's mistress and takes it upon herself to get the woman out of there
Comments: 13
Kudos: 36





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> Me and RatKingDad adore Maria Reynolds she deserved better
> 
> Susan only speaks uwu sorry gang

Bile rose thick and acidic in Eliza’s throat as she read the headline over and over. Her husband had cheated and now he had admitted it to the whole world. Secretary of Treasury Alexander Hamilton, caught in an affair with an unemployed woman of all things. The details of the event were visceral throughout his resignation statement, including the specifics of Maria Reynolds, the woman he had cheated with, and her situation with her husband. At first, she had felt anger at the young woman, but then that anger turned to pity and her fury turned itself onto her husband. The woman was slandered, bringing up status and employment, which Eliza felt was irrelevant to the situation at hand.

That and Eliza’s general sympathy for people may have been why she ended up on Maria’s (or who she hoped was Maria) doorstep. The housing complex seemed normal, though, Eliza could note unnatural marks on the door she was standing in front of, contemplating whether to knock. She didn’t know why she was hesitant (that wasn’t entirely true, it is her husband’s mistress). Eventually, she bucked up the courage, tapping three succinct beats on the chipped paint. The door opened just a crack, slowly and creaking. Just one eye was visible, ringed slightly with a purpling bruise on brown skin. A chain prevented the door from opening further. 

“Ma’am? Is a Mrs. Reynolds home?” she asked gently, trying not to scare the skittish figure. 

“Who’s asking?” The question was slightly aggressive and Eliza had to fight hard not to be offended by being so casually dismissed. She straightened her spine, chin up and shoulders back.

“Elizabeth Hamilton, I believe you know my husband,”

When they heard the surname, the already skittish figure looked more frightened, their eyes looking around Eliza frantically, before looking back to Eliza, though none of the fear had left their eyes.

‘’What do you want?’’ The tone seemed to have been intended to be aggressive but the fear was evident.

So the figure must be Maria Reynolds then. 

"May I speak to you?"

The figure's eyes widened and winced, probably due to the still forming bruise. 

‘’No I don’t think you should’’ Eliza struggled not to take offense from that. This woman slept with her husband and she thought she could just slam the door in her face? She jammed her hand in the crack of the door, practically daring Maria to close it on her.

“Oh, I definitely think I should,” she insisted, using a tone she reserved for misbehaving students and feeling only a little sorry when Maria flinched back. 

“The place is a mess, ma’am, you really don’t want to see it,” Maria’s voice was shaking. Still, Eliza presses forward. 

“I have seven children, Maria, the mess can’t be anything I haven’t seen before,” A resigned sigh came from inside and with a click, the chain was gone. The second she entered, Eliza saw exactly what Maria had been talking about.

Chairs were overturned and scattered about, some destroyed and smashed to splinters. Holes littered the drywall and there were visible smoke stains on the paint. Small circular burns were dotted on the carpet and upholstery, ones that Eliza winced to see matched the size and shape of a few she could see on Maria’s just exposed wrist. The closed door across the hall had a fist mark, similar in size to the holes in the wall, though the door hadn’t been broken.

Maria's face was flush, showing through the grayish hue that tainted her dark skin. She was so… young. Barely more than a child, certainly she couldn’t be long out of college if she had gone at all. Eliza tore her eyes away from the wreck of furniture and looked to Maria, trying to mask her shock at the mess

‘’Is there tea?’’

The young woman’s eyes widened, darting around the mess and to everywhere but Eliza. She slowly curled in on herself, though Eliza heard a hiss escape her when her arms made contact with her sternum. Trying to walk closer to her wrought Maria jumping back, panting a bit.

‘’I can’t, we don’t, he doesn’t-’’ she stammered out. Her helpless stuttering was interrupted by a small voice.

‘’Mama?’’

A small girl had entered the room, presumably upon hearing the voices, from the room with the fist marked door. If Eliza had to guess she’d say the girl was around her AJ’s age, though she looked younger. Maria seemed to force herself to calm down upon seeing the child

‘’What is it Sunny?’’ Her voice had softened, fear still apparent though she was clearly trying to mask it.

The girl looked to Eliza who was lingering amongst the wreckage. The wreckage didn’t seem to frighten the girl, though Eliza’s presence seemed to. She shuffled towards Maria, though with a slight limp (Had she done that to the girl?)

‘’Who’s that Mama?’’

‘’Elizabeth Hamilton, she came in to see me’’

The girl seemed to hesitate before softly asking her mother another question

‘’Is she one of Dad’s friends?’’

Maria stroked the girl’s hair out of her face

‘’Not as far as I know. She wants to speak with me’’

The girl gave an affirmative hum. She looked at Eliza again, as if determining if she as a threat, before turning back to Maria

‘’M’leg still hurts Mama’’ With the little girls mumbled words, Eliza watched Maria’s eyes screw shut, her face contorted in pain for just a moment before resolving itself.

‘’I know Sun, I know’’

‘’Can you carry me?’’ 

Maria closed her eyes for just a second again. “Of course I can baby,” 

Her movements were small and slow as she wrapped her arms around her daughter, like a rusted machine just now put into use. Still though, Eliza had to admire how the small and fragile woman managed to straighten herself with a school aged child in her arms. Clearly, there was some strength there that she was missing. Her mouth opened and closed a few times, but she could find no words for Maria.

Maria was visibly in pain, letting out a small hiss of pain, though she kept hold of the small girl who now had her head on the woman’s shoulder and was fiddling with the ends of Maria’s hair that she could reach. Seeing the girl closer, Eliza could see a similar greyish hue to Maria on her slightly lighter skin, though much worse than her mother.

"What did you want Mrs Hamilton?’’

Truth be told Eliza had arrived to hear the younger woman’s side of the story. However hearing the woman’s desperate stammering at what she thought was an inconsequential question, and the state of the house as well as Maria and her daughter led her to believe something more sinister was happening in the house. So she decided to be direct with her questioning 

‘’Mrs. Reynolds do you need help?’’

The woman stood back, as if startled by Eliza’s question

‘’I’m perfectly fine Mrs Hamilton’’

Eliza almost expected that reaction, Maria wasn’t going to confide anything to a woman she’d only just met. Eliza glanced at the child being held by the woman, who was now looking at Eliza

‘’Does your daughter need help?’’

‘’Oh I would take her to the hospital but-’’ The woman trailed off, as if she said too much

‘’But?’’

The woman seemed to search for an excuse, before finally responding

‘’You know how men can get, my husband is so stubborn about all those hospital bills’’ The woman was lying through her teeth, Eliza could tell. Her attitude towards her husband only heightened Eliza’s concerns

‘’No, as much harm as Alex has managed to do, I can’t say he’s ever stopped me from taking the kids to the hospital when they needed help,” She kept her voice firm, trying to impart onto this woman just how ridiculous her statement had been. At the mention of Alex’s name, Maria flinched harshly. Hastily, Eliza made an effort to soothe her, “Mrs. Reynolds, would you like my number?”

The woman seemed startled, so Eliza clarified

"Just if you need help or to just talk to someone, you can call me" Maria seemed uncomfortable at the offer and for a second Eliza considered just calling the police if she didn’t take it. But then she handed over her phone with the contacts open. Just as Eliza was going to type her name into a new contact, Maria jumped a bit.

“Just, don’t put your real last name, please. James won’t like that,” Her voice wavered like a child who was about to cry and so Eliza obeyed, putting her name down as Elizabeth Schuyler instead. Upon inputting her number, Eliza couldn’t help noticing the distinct lack of contacts in the contact list, only having her newly inputted number, James’ number and a number saved under ‘Pizza’ (though Eliza would note, it didn’t have the NYC area code at all) “Is that all Mrs. Hamilton?”  
“Ah, no, not really Maria,” Her anger still remained, anger at her husband now mainly but still some lingered for the young woman in front of her. “I just want to know why really,”

Maria looked down, a bit ashamed, before she bluffed up a little, something strong and fiery taking over her face for a moment. Despite the girl on her hip, the woman looked ten feet taller than she had before.

“I needed money, your husband provided it. I asked if I could repay and he seemed eager enough,” Maria’ voice was smoother and colder than it had been since Eliza walked in the door. “ The rest of it, well, James, my husband, saw an opportunity for his own gain. I’m sure you’ve read all about it. And once James knew, well, I couldn’t exactly stop could I?”

The nonchalance with which the woman described the situation took her aback. 

“You’re going to look me in the eye and say you had no choice at all? Do you think I believe that?” Eliza said indignantly. A small chuckle escaped the woman and she shook her head, making Eliza feel horrendously condescended to by someone who had to be decades her junior. 

“Just remember Mrs. Hamilton, Mr. Hamilton chose to have sex with me every time he did, it’s what he was paying my husband for,” Bitterness and viscous fury coated the words. Eliza’s eyes widened. How could that be? “Oh he didn’t say it did he, the price wasn’t all for blackmail, I believe the email went something like ‘You can keep seeing my whore wife if the price is right, if not I’m telling your wife’. Your husband was no angel here,”

Eliza gritted her teeth against the comment. She was standing in front of her husband’s mistress and the woman dared make her feel humiliated? Still, she wasn’t cruel. Shouting would only scare the small child. Instead, she held her chin up, looking down her nose like she had been taught to do as a girl of good society.

“Well then, Maria, I suppose we’re done here,” She didn’t wait for a response before turning to leave. Still, she couldn’t stop the worry of what would happen in the home when she was gone.


	2. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Susan is an absolute C H I L D
> 
> Maria does not deserve this

About a week later, Eliza still hadn’t heard from Maria. She was getting concerned though she didn’t say anything or contact the woman, knowing it would end badly for her. That was until she was doing the dishes and her phone rang. It was an unknown number and for just a moment she considered not answering it, fearing it was a telemarketer. Later, she would consider her choice to pick up one of the best she had ever made.

“Hello?” she questioned. For a moment there was no noise and she almost hung up. Then there was a tiny sniffle.

“Mommy’s hurt,” a small voice whimpered out. A pang stabbed her through the chest. 

“What? Who is this?” Her voice rose to a high pitch in her panic.

“M’ Susan Reynolds. Are you the nice lady who spoke to my mama?” 

Eliza felt as though she had been hit with a brick wall. Her hands started shaking and her phone nearly slipped from her grip as she rushed towards the door, shoving her shoes on.

“Yes, yes I am. Can you stay on the line for me, Susan?” 

“Yeah, I can. Mommy’s hurt.” 

As if on cue, a high pitched noise of pain came from the background of the call. Eliza felt sick hearing it, though it was soon drowned out by the small girl’s pleas, which had become more distressed

‘’She’s on the floor, she’s really hurt’’ her voice was so small and so broken. Eliza felt her heart crack in half to hear it. She was running by this point, the Reynolds were only a block away and yet it felt like miles and miles as she tried to get there as fast as possible. 

“Susan, honey, is it safe for you to open the door for me?” There was a small hum of affirmation in reply. 

“Mommy and daddy are upstairs. Daddy’s angry again.” 

The door was mercifully open when Eliza got there, though she could see a chair where the little girl must have had to stand to get the chain off. Susan herself was curled up by an overturned couch, and Eliza breathed a massive sigh of relief that she looked relatively unharmed. She was curled up sobbing and a horrid banging came from upstairs, causing the small girl to jump. Sounds of yelling came from upstairs, to which Susan curled into herself tighter.

Eliza had to consider her choice at this point. She could go upstairs and risk angering James further, which could end badly for her, Maria or Susan, or stay with the youngest Reynolds and call for emergency services, which could risk Maria further. In the midst of her thoughts Eliza felt something attach to her. It was Susan, who was sniffling and clinging to Eliza for some sort of comfort.

At that point, Eliza decided she had to get the girl out. Truthfully, she knew she couldn’t fend off James, it would only end badly for her and very likely Maria. She kneeled down to the girls level before asking,

“Hey sweetie do you think you can come outside with me? If you do I can get someone to come help your mom,” 

Susan’s eyes widened and she looked a bit nervous at the prospect.

“Daddy doesn’t like it when mommy and I go outside,” The words made Eliza’s jaw clench, teeth grinding against teeth in an effort to quell her burning anger at this man. She forced her face to remain gentle.

“Well, I’m going to get someone to help with that,” 

A small nod was all the response she got before Susan was uncurled and walking towards the front door. Eliza winced to see that there were more marks on the door frame than there had been the week prior. For just a second, the girl looked back in apprehension, but a reassuring smile is all it took to send her forward and out of the townhouse. 

Throughout the 911 call, Susan remained sitting cross legged on the steps, any attempt to beckon her further yielding a squeak and frantic shake of the head. When the police finally arrived, everything became a blur of red and blue lights and black uniforms. A woman took Eliza’s statement and another officer wrapped Susan up in a blanket. 

The worst of it came when James was dragged out, kicking and screaming. He collapsed on his knees forcing the officers to carry him and the scratches on his arms said that it had not been easy to get him in handcuffs. Even from a distance, Eliza could see Susan become more distressed upon seeing her father. Over James' yells she could hear the girl ask about Maria. The police had brought in paramedics which had visibly startled the young girl. 

The EMTS went into the home and Eliza almost ran to cover Susan’s eyes, probably would have if not for the fact that the officer sitting with her did it already. Brought out a stretcher was Maria who looked horrifyingly battered. Most of her body was covered in a sheet but still the sheer amount of blood on the clothing that was visible, along with the mangled state of her face, painted a terrible picture of what James had been doing to her when Susan had called. What on God’s green Earth could get a man so angry that he would do that to a woman he was supposed to love?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)
> 
> :)
> 
> :)


	3. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> UwU Plot twist

It had been weeks, Maria had not left hospital. Aside from the injuries from the severe assault from the day James was arrested, the young woman had injuries that had been left untreated for what doctors thought could be months, along with a fractured wrist, that had healed incorrectly, leaving the bone in the wrist jutting out an awkward angle. Thankfully Susan had mostly been left unharmed, the mysterious limp being diagnosed as a sprained leg. The environment she had grown up in along with being born in the home with no professionals was believed to be the reason behind her stunted growth. 

Eliza had found herself spending as much time at the hospital as possible. She couldn’t stay out too long, but after school hours and when the younger kids were all asleep, she trusted the older ones with Alex. Next to Maria’s bed she set herself up everyday with a laptop, watching as the woman mostly slept. When she was awake, there was little Maria could say, and the bruises that were curled around her neck gave Eliza some clue as to why. Her trachea had been crushed as James had tried to strangle her and now there was a scar where they had had to operate to repair it. The woman’s breathing was back to normal, but it would take weeks before she was able to speak comfortably. 

The only way for Eliza to talk to Maria in her moment’s of consciousness was through writing or typing. 

An awkward scratching filled the air, Maria’s left hand scribbling on a napkin while her cast wrapped right held it down onto the table in front of her. 

How’s Susan? The writing was sloppy (She had a feeling that Maria was writing with her non-dominant hand) but years of reading students’ chicken scratch had prepared Eliza for this.

“She’s doing alright,” Eliza assured, “They’ve got her in state custody right now, but once you’re feeling better they should release her to you,”

Maria made a jerky movement with her head that brought tears to her eyes. She began scrawling again.

No job No house No GED Won't give her back the paper said. The woman’s expression was defeated and broken. Eliza’s brow furrowed in thought before a thought came to her.

“We could use someone to help around the house with the kids and we have enough room for both you and Susan. If you come stay with us, none of that will be a problem,” she propositioned gently, placing Maria’s uninjured hand in hers. Tears began streaming down Maria’s face and she looked up at Eliza with wide eyes, looking at once so young and so old. Eliza didn’t need any writing to see the thank you there.

Once Maria was feeling a little better, her face much more back to its regular state, Eliza was informed of something. Apparently, there was a missing person’s case that was filed in upstate New York six years ago and Maria Reynolds looked an awful lot like Maria Lewis. She looked up the case herself and was taken aback by not only the picture, but the date of birth that was marked across the poster. The teen in that photo was smiling, her skin was warm and not vaguely gray, her arms were unmarked. And her age, oh god her age. 

Eliza didn’t want to believe that this woman was only 23, she didn’t want to believe it because how could someone so young look so weighed down by the world. Her husband had slept with a 23 year old who came to him begging for help. 

Apparently, Eliza was the only other person that Maria had contact with besides James. It was all just… too much. 

Police had taken James and Maria’s phones to search for evidence of the extortion of Alexander Hamilton. Upon seeing the Pizza number, police recognized the area code as that of upstate New York, and took the number for analysis. Hours later they came back with a name; Richard Lewis. The sound of it seemed to add another weight onto Maria’s chest, her eyes closing for just a second before opening again. 

Certain police officers looked like they’d seen a ghost. The coincidences were too strong, similar appearance, same first name, ages matched up, having contact with Richard Lewis, it all added up to one thing; Maria Reynolds had to be Maria Lewis.

Asking Maria about it seemed to upset the young woman, despite her having not spoken since her arrival in hospital, possibly due to vocal chord damage. The only choice now was to call Richard. Officers who seemed to know the man personally were sent to do it, hoping they would know how to break it to him. Despite the phone not being on speaker, they could hear the man’s responses

‘’Rich, buddy you won’t believe it, we found Maria’’ the officer’s voice was fragile and Eliza wondered if he had known her before. The response was audible through the phone.

There was a wail, one that sounded more pain and animalistic sob than human. And then a disbelieving voice broke through gasping cries.

“My baby! You found her! Oh God, she’s okay! Where- where is she?” Despite the officer’s attempt at privacy Richard was so emphatic that his voice rang throughout the hospital room. 

‘’Rich, Rich she’s here she’s in Columbia Presbyterian Hospital, we found her in Harlem,”

‘’Hospital? What’s wrong?” His voice had risen to levels so astronomical that the officer found it pertinent to walk out of the room.

Maria didn’t seem to be relieved hearing her father’s voice. On the contrary she looked terrified. Desperately grabbing at the napkin, she scrawled quickly; Don’t bring him. He’ll be angry, I left. Please. The writing was rushed and messy.

‘’What do you mean? He’s your father’’ Eliza gripped her hand, unsure of why these protective urges had started appearing for a girl who up until a few weeks ago had merely been her husband’s mistress. “He won’t hurt you will he?” 

Maria shook her head furiously. She pointed down at the napkin. angry, I left. Please. 

Eliza melted a bit at the girl’s clear fear. She leaned in and spoke gently, “Maria, could anything in this world make you so mad at Susan that you would never want to see her again?” 

With a questioning look, Maria shook her head again, slower this time. She placed her hands out in a motion that said “So what?”

“Your father probably feels the same way. I’m sure that no matter what he just wants to see you again Maria,” she kept her voice low, to the volume she would when talking to a student in distress. There was no way to tell if the tears running down Maria’s face were of joy or fear.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> UwU lmao


	4. 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There be some rude words in this one sorry boyos

Once Richard arrived, police brought everyone else out of the room, to give Maria and her father some privacy. Eliza only caught a glimpse of the man, grey haired and puffy eyed, rushing into the room. Though the door was closed, Eliza could hear the man speak, though it was muffled. Another wail.

“My baby, oh my girl who did this?” Eliza couldn’t fathom what he was feeling. She thought of her own children and felt her heart clech like a fist at the thought of anyone of them going missing. When Phillip stayed out too long in the summer, spending hours with other kids outside, she knew the pit that would grow and fall heavy in her stomach, not relieving itself until she saw him again. Six years was far too long for a parent to not be able to hold their child.

There was no audible response from Maria, likely because the woman was still struggling to speak. She must have written something though, because there was an angry growl. 

“I’ll kill him! That son of a bitch!” the man’s voice rang out loud and clear. Eliza jumped back, shocked. Maria must have responded similarly as the man quickly backtracked, “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. Oh, Ria I’m so sorry,”

“Daddy,” a cracked and quiet voice strained out. After that there was only crying and when Eliza next looked into the room she could see them both sobbing heavily into each other’s arms. Seeing her peaking in, Maria gestured that it was okay for Eliza to enter. After getting the go ahead from the police officer sitting next to her, Eliza did just that. 

Hastily, Richard got himself composed, wiping his eyes and calming his breath but not letting go of Maria’s uninjured hand, nor did his gaze leave her for long. His eyes were wide, mouth slightly agape like he was seeing a ghost. Given that Maria had been presumed dead, she supposed it must feel like that.

“Are you a friend of hers?” he asked, only looking at Eliza for a second before turning back to his daughter. A bit of bile rose in Eliza’s throat. 

“Something like that. I’m Elizabeth Hamilton, but you can call me Eliza,” she said, keeping her voice even although her heart raced with the slight lie. Maria took her hand out of her father’s for a moment to write something out.

She saved me. Called 911. The note read. She shot Eliza a grateful smile and Richard stared up at her like she was an angel. A red flush rose up in Eliza’s cheeks, a humble embarrassment.

“I did what anyone would do. Susan called me and she just sounded… so afraid,” her voice cracked on the last word. She placed a hand over her mouth to stop her own cries. A look of confusion crashed over Richard’s face.

“Susan?” his eyebrow raised and his mouth quirked down at the corners. Eliza came to sit next to him, head cocked slightly to the side. Maria’s eyes had screwed shut, a few tears going down her face.

“Maria’s daughter?” She prompted, looking for any recognition on his face. Instead, there was a spark of realization in deep brown eyes, so similar to Maria’s and so similar to Susan’s. 

He stared at Eliza, his look piercing into her soul and looking for the answers in may hold. She shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “How old is she?”

“Si-ix” Maria croaked out. Her eyes were still closed tightly and she tried to turn away from her father. Eliza had never felt more like an intruder than when Richard gently guided Maria to face him head on.

“Ria, were you pregnant when you left?” he asked gravely. Maria only nodded, fear filling her face. He let in a sharp inhale of breath, head falling into his hands. “Dear God,”

“Sor-r-ry,” Maria stuttered, beginning to cry. Evidently, the amount of speaking she had done proved to be too much as she dissolved into a harsh coughing fit. Eliza rushed to get the woman water, not wanting her to open up any of her stitches. Maria nearly choked on the liquid, which forced Eliza to sit her up, rubbing her back as the girl rapidly drank in an attempt to soothe some of her pain with the cool liquid. 

She whispered comfortingly to the girl, “It’s okay now, deep breaths,”. Her ministrations and soothing words didn’t stop until Maria’s breathing went back completely to normal. “There’s a good girl,”

There was silence for only a moment. All that was audible was Richard’s crying and mumbling to himself, shaking his head as he did. Maria looked like she could break at any moment until suddenly her father spoke.

“There’s no need to be sorry,” Richard said through harsh tears, pinching the bridge of his nose. Carefully, Eliza transferred Maria from her arms to her father and sat back in one of the uncomfortable plastic chairs next to the bed. Richard spoke up

"How old was that man six years ago?" Maria stiffened in her father's arms, looking up with wide and slightly fearful eyes.

"What?" Richard’s face was deadly serious.

"How old was he Ria?" he asked gravely, as though he already knew the answer. Tears began rolling faster down Maria’s cheeks, soaking into her hospital gown.

Maria's voice shook as she responded, "Twenty-one"

Richard looked even angrier if possible, warm brown skin turning brick red and hands clenched into fists even as he continued to hold his daughter close.

"Exactly,” he said, voice firm and 10 degrees colder. Maria started to sob softly, arms over face. “I’m sorry baby, I’m not mad at you, I’m sorry,” 

The air in the room was stuffy and heavy, and Eliza felt it’s cloying warmth choking her. She had the distinct impression of someone who was seeing something that she should not be seeing. Now was as good a time as any to take her leave. She stood slowly and carefully, shooting Maria as kind of a smile as she could manage.

“I’ll leave you two be. See you tomorrow Maria,” she waved goodbye, a twinge gripping her heart at the teary grin that Maria replied with. She shrugged her coat back on and wrapped her hands around her keys. It was time to go back to her own family and let this one heal for a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully more Susan content at ,, some point


	5. 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maria POV 
> 
> also we get some sweet sweet flashback content

''Why'd you leave Ria, why?'' Richard asked desperately. Maria’s soul curled up small and shy inside of her stomach as he searched her face. There were things hidden behind her irises, her bruises and her paper mache skin that she had no interest in her father seeing.

''You would have hated me. You would have been rid of me when you found out,” her voice was firm despite its raspy quality. It was what James had told her, and so it must be true. If it wasn’t true then it was a lie, and James couldn’t be a liar. He could be mad if she accused him of being a liar. 

''Rid of you?” Richard questioned, voice bending up at the end in inquiry. His hand under her chin guided her to look at him despite her best efforts, “ Never Ria, never. You could’ve come, we would have listened, I promise you'' 

We. The world hit Maria in a place in her chest that she had thought was locked up forever, for her protection and for the protection of her daughter. She grabbed at her father, leaning into his familiar firm warmth. In all these years, she never forgot what her dad smelled like. It wasn’t necessarily a scent she could describe, more of a warm feeling that wrapped around her entire body. And it was overwhelming her as she grasped at his shirt. "Daddy, where's mom?"

Her dad’s eyes closed for just a moment, steeling himself. For just a moment, Maria feared that her mother hated her, that she didn’t want to see her anymore. His next words revealed the truth to be so much worse, "Oh Ria she- she got sick and she passed on"

"She's gone?" Maria’s voice broke ‘’She left?’’

"Yeah, baby" 

Shifting as close to her father as possible, Maria buried her face into his chest. Sobs tore through her lungs, roughing up her throat and sapping her of whatever energy she had left.

“Daddy?” she mumbled, feeling horribly childish but so, so, loved. 

“Yeah baby?” 

“I’m tired. I’m gonna sleep,” her voice was light and low, the rasp turning into a wheeze as she struggled through it. Her dad frowned, holding her closer. His hand pressed into a particularly sore spot on her back, causing a hiss to escape her. He jumped back, face just as pained as hers.

“I just got here, Ria,” he begged, helplessly. 

“Please,” her voice raised, cracking as pain shot through in. A metallic taste coated her tongue, “I just want to sleep Daddy. I’m so tired,”

Pounding overtook her skull, making her grind her teeth to not cry out in pain. Panic came with it. Maybe she didn’t remember her father correctly. James had told her that her dad was angry, that he was way too controlling and overprotective. She had never quite believed him. But still, she was telling him to do something, she was marking a line in the sand and claiming something for her own. What if he got angry?

Her eyes went down to his hands. They were hands that had never been cruel to her, hands that had only even taken care of her. Those fingers combed through her hair when she was little, taking out knots and tangles. Hands that had gripped her shoulders as she learned to ride a bike, keeping her steady and upright. Her dad had only ever supported her. 

James’ hands had been weapons. Hammers that knocked down walls and smashed glass fragile hearts and equally fragile self worth. They were strong in all the wrong ways, using their force for cruelty rather than support. In short, they were nothing like her father’s. 

So why was she afraid of her dad hurting her like James had? 

He took a sharp inhale of breath and Maria waited. Counted down 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 seconds and braced for a smack for her insubordination. But it never came, she was met only with a gentle squeeze to her shoulder. 

“Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow, Ria. I love you so much,” And he turned to leave. Tears rolled heavily down Maria’s face, stinging against the raw skin, already red from the infinite amount of crying she had done in the last few days. Hell, in the last few years. 

It had been so long since someone other than Susan had told her that they loved her. At the thought of Susan, Maria whimpered, biting down on her blanket. She missed her girl so, so much. They had barely spent a day away from each other since she was born. And what a birth it was. 

'The pain was overwhelming, like period cramps but a million times more intense. Her water had broken nearly two hours ago, and she had no idea how far into labor she was. James convinced her not to go to the hospital. They couldn’t afford it, he said, and since she was still a minor they would want to call her parents. And her parents would be angry and take her away from him. They didn’t love Maria like James did. He freed her, didn’t he? She doubted that fact less every time he said it, squeezing her upper arm just a little too hard, eyes hard and fiery.

And here he was, holding her hand as she screamed, muffled only by a rag shoved into her mouth. But he got bored of waiting, eventually. He left, promising that he would come back soon.

A day and a half went by of that agonizing and debilitating pain. She wasn’t sure how she managed to remain conscious. She wasn’t sure she did. There were flashes of white and she wondered if maybe this was it, if she was dying. And then, finally, finally, she had her girl in her arms. She looked so much like James, had his nose and his firm brow. And his strong grip, if the way she instinctively wrapped her little hand around Maria’s outstretched finger was any indication. 

It was like none of the pain had ever existed, maybe because she was so exhausted that her entire body was numb. But then, the baby girl opened her eyes, and they were Maria’s. She had always known she had her mother’s eyes, but then looking at the baby she really knew it. Her mother’s name was Susana. That’s when the name came to her. Susan Reynolds had her father’s strength, but her mother’s soul. The best of both of them.

She spent days alone in pain with that little girl, counting her fingers and toes over and over just to make sure there were still ten of each. Her cries pierced the air constantly, but at least she was breathing, at least she was alive. Maria was lucky, she supposed. For a home birth that she had done alone, she was incredibly fortunate that Susan was alive and so was she. A love formed for her daughter in those days, a bond that could never be broken by the most horribly gigantic force in the world.

James came back, eventually, a prescription bottle in hand for antibiotics that did not belong to him, and washable cloth diapers in the other. He cradled them both when he got back. Telling her how he would protect them, how he would never let the world hurt them. They were his girls, and to be his meant so much. And Maria loved him, Maria believed him. She kept believing him, even after the first time a bruising grip left marks on her arm. Even after grips turned to slaps turned to shoves and punches and kicks. In all of that, he never touched Susan. Maria refused to let him.'

She sobbed quietly, alone in that hospital room. Thoughts of Susan filled her mind and overwhelmed her with fear. Were they taking care of her wherever she was? Did they know that she liked her pb&js with more peanut butter than jelly and she couldn’t sleep without a bedtime story and song? Did she have her blanket and her bunny? Most importantly, Maria wondered if Susan missed her the way she missed Susan. 

Exhaustion overtook everything, lead weights attached to her limbs. As her eyes closed, the last thing she thought before letting the darkness wash away everything was of a little girl’s voice asking, ''Mama, will it all be okay?''

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Susan will appear in person next chapter


	6. 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maria is a peak mama and Susan is peak babey

Though Maria's custody of Susan was still up in the air, supervised visits with the girl were deemed beneficial to both. After weeks of recovery and visits with her father and a reunion with her siblings (a lot of tears all around), Maria was allowed out to visit Susan at a government building.

Maria didn’t know where all the anxiety was coming from, but here she was, sitting in her father’s car, desperately trying to push down the anxiety building up. Was Susan upset? Did she even want to see her? Would she even remember her? Her thoughts churned irrationally, curdling and turning her stomach. Part of her knew she was being unreasonable, aside from James (who Maria didn’t want to think about more than she already did), she was the only person Susan had contact with. Of course Susan would know her. 

Still, the idea of it curled around and made a home inside her mind. The building was nice, clinical if anything. It smelled like lemon Pine Sol and baby powder. It was so… gray. Impersonal in a way that she supposed it had to be in order to be everything for everyone who came into it. Giving her name and ID (a driver’s license she had gotten a year after Susan was born when James left them for the eight or ninth time. It was just on the edge of expiring), she was led into a back room. It was plain, beige carpet and white walls and a folded table and chairs. A social worker, tall and lanky, sat on one side of the table. But everything about him and the room was nothing when Maria got her eyes on the most important thing in the world. Her little Sunshine sitting criss cross on top of the chair, looking tired but still shining. Her only bright spot in the world. 

All worry that Susan had forgotten her was eliminated when they locked eyes. The girl hopped up and rushed over to her, clinging tightly to her legs. For just a moment, Maria froze as it felt too good to be true. But when the warmth of her daughter registered she was brought to her knees before the force of love so divine and inherent to her bones. With Susan in her arms, the world was alright. 

She wasn’t sure how long the moment lasted. It felt like infinity and a second at the same time before the social worker cleared his throat. Broken out of her reverie, Maria realised she was crying. Hastily, she wiped her tears on her sleeve and reached out a hand for the man to shake. 

He spoke to her about things that she barely understood. Words on legal counsel and custodial litigation and a million words she didn’t know. And she tried to listen, she absorbed most of it, but much of her focus was on her daughter playing in the corner of the room. He seemed to realise this eventually, smiling at her softly when she asked him to repeat a sentence for the third time, distracted by Susan laughing at a picture book. 

“I have to stay in here while you two play, but I also want to set up a meeting for just the two of us later. Our goal is to get you your daughter back Mrs. Reynolds, and we’ll do as much as we can to get you there,” the social worker (Mr. Smith? Mr. Schmidt? She hadn’t really been paying attention because Susan had still been clinging to her when he introduced himself). 

Mr. S went back to sitting in the corner of the room, leaving Maria as alone as she could be with her daughter. Susan looked up at her with those wide and soulful eyes and it was all she could do to not melt into a puddle. 

“Mama? Are you done talking now? Can we play?” her girl asked eagerly. Maria grinned at her, wider than she had smiled in weeks. Crouching down, Susan instantly ran back into her arms and it felt like the most natural thing in the world.

“Yeah sugar, wanna tell me what his name is?” Maria asked, gesturing to the teddy bear Susan had sat up carefully. Susan shook her head, nuzzling into the nape of her neck.

“Not he, she. Her name is Liza, like the nice lady who helped us,”she mumbled, words weighed down with a weight that a six year old should not be capable of. It broke Maria’s heart that her little girl knew so much of how harsh the world could be when she was so young. 

‘’Oh’’

Susan looked up from where she was holding onto Maria, eyes curious

‘’Where’ve you been Mama? Why didn’t they let me see you?’’

Maria considered her words, not wanting to scare her daughter with the graphic details. Susan had seen her injured before, of course, but you can’t tell a six year old about hospitals and divorce and criminal proceedings. Oh god, how was she going to tell Susan that she needed to talk to the police. No kid deserved to have to deal with that, least of all her baby who had been so good and so strong for so long.

‘’I was hurt, so they kept me at the hospital for a while so I could get better,” she assured, taking a moment to drink in the sight of her daughter. Her cheeks were pink and her clothes were new and clean. There was no dirt beneath her fingernails and her eyes had that sparkle that had kept Maria going for so many years. Yet, Susan looked like something was bothering her as she mulled over the answer 

‘’Weren’t you lonely Mama?’’ Susan asked, small and innocent and somehow unaware of the horrors that had surrounded her her entire life. She held her daughter close to her and suddenly everything felt right. There had been an empty ache in her chest for weeks and the feeling of Susan in her arms filled it. Her girl was her life and to miss her was torture.

“A little, I didn’t have my Sunshine,” she poked Susan’s tummy, causing the girl to giggle. The noise of it was the purest thing in the world and warmed Maria’s cold lungs to hear.

“That tickles Mama!” the little girl shrieked, squirming but not moving away from her. 

“Does it now?”

“Yeah! But Mama, were you really really lonely?” The question made Maria sigh. Her hand carded through her daughter’s hair, so like James’ but so much more soft. Though she clearly had had her hair washed with different shampoo, somehow she still smelled like something distinctly Susan. It was a scent that was imprinted into Maria’s heart and soul. 

“No baby, I missed you a ton, but I had Miss Elizabeth and my dad there with me,” Even the act of mentioning her father caused Maria’s stomach to jump and her heart to stutter. She wondered if he felt for her like she felt for Susan. If being away from her for all those years had been as tortuous for him as she could imagine it would be for her.

‘’Your dad?’’ Maria could practically see the gears turning in Susan’s head. She had mentioned her parents briefly to Susan, years before. “Is he an old old man Mama? Like a hundred years old?’’

Maria laughed and the sound surprised her. It had been so long since she had laughed in a way that really pulled at her lungs and didn’t just rest shakily in her throat. 

“Now why would my daddy be that old?” she questioned. Susan shrugged, looking up at the ceiling and moving her finger in the air like she was doing math.

“Well, you’re my mama so you’re old and if you have a daddy he must be really old,” Susan justified, seemingly satisfied with her impeccable logic. She beamed at Maria proudly, eyes wide and chin tilted up. Maria laughed again and shook her head.

“I’m not that old baby,” Maria said with mock offense, “In fact, my dad is only a little bit older than Miss Elizabeth,”

Susan’s eyes got infinitely wider and her mouth opened slightly. “Woah, that’s so cool,” 

“Do you want to meet him?” Maria asked, eyes going to the social worker in the corner who gave her a thumbs up. Susan rocked on her heels, bouncing a bit in excitement.

“Yes! Yes!” she exclaimed. Then, she sobered concerningly, squinting and looking down at her feet. “Is he nicer than my daddy?”

Maria’s heart shattered at the fear on the little girl’s face. She put a hand on Susan’s cheek, gently guiding the girl to look up at her. “Much nicer,”

“That’s good, I like nice people,” it was like that was a new revelation for the girl. Maybe it was, right now she was meeting more people than she had in her entire life. A twinge of jealousy hit her. These people could take care of Susan so much better than she could. What if Susan liked them more than her? 

Maria tried to put those thoughts aside as Mr S opened the door to Richard. Despite her earlier eagerness to meet him, upon Richard entering, Susan shied away from him, latching back onto Maria. Maria held onto Susan protectively. Yes this was her father but she couldn’t fully trust anyone with her Sunshine, not yet, not even the girl’s grandfather.

Maria could see her father get slightly misty eyed. Maybe it was the resemblance to Susanna, maybe it was that this was the first time he was meeting his already six year old granddaughter, maybe both. She wondered if every time she saw her father he would be crying like this. 

‘’Hey baby, I’m your Grandpa Rich’’ The man said, voice low and gentle. It rumbled in Maria’s chest familiarly, warming her up. In the years that she hadn’t seen her father, it had been his voice that she had missed most of all. She had almost forgotten it. Susan ducked behind Maria’s legs at the unfamiliar man, staring up at her as if for approval. Maria gave her a warm smile and a nod, though she didn’t push her forward. Trust was something to earn now, something Maria could not afford to give out freely, and Susan knew that well.

“Popa,” Susan’s mouth formed awkwardly around the unfamiliar word. Tears welled up in Maria’s eyes, that’s what she had called her grandfather, before he had passed about two weeks before she left with James. That had been one thing that she regretted deeply, leaving her family so soon after her popa did. Her heart stuttered in a staccato beat as her father kneeled down to look Susan in the eye.

Her father grabbed Maria’s hand, squeezing it tightly. “Yeah, I’m your popa. I know you don’t know me, but I love you already,” 

Susan made grabby hands at him, getting in front of Maria and tugging on his tie. Richard relented, bowing his head and with a resounding pop, Susan planted a kiss onto his balding head. The tears that had been blurring Maria’s vision fell at the sight, a hand clenching her chest. She gave her father a watery smile.

“Love you too, popa,” Susan murmured. This, Maria realized, was her family. Her real family. And she loved them more than life itself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There might be some Susan angst in the next chapter idk


	7. 7

‘’Can you tell me your name?’’ The prosecutor asked. It broke Maria’s heart to see such a small figure on the witness stand, only the very top of her head visible. Her baby’s eyes went to her, looking for reassurance, for comfort. She smiled slightly, trying to impart all of her love in the look.The small girl seemed to think for a minute before responding

“Susan Reynolds.” her voice shook as she answered, though it was no lie. Maria could only pray that they would see that her girl was just shy. Her hands shook in her lap.

“And how old are you?”

  
“Six,” A slight murmur happened across the courtroom, quickly silenced. A 23 year old and a 27 old with a six year old child? It certainly didn't look good. Susan’s head tiled inquisitively, brown eyes filled with curiosity, “ How old are you?”

The prosecutor laughed a bit before continuing. He was a nice enough man, helping Maria out on this case. He assured her that it was quite cut and dry, that James wouldn’t hurt her or Susan again. Senator Burr had helped out with finding him and Secretary Hamilton was paying since Maria herself could not. “I’m 34. Do you know why you’re here Susan?”

  
There was a pregnant pause, one where Susan looked more confused than anything. Her tiny hands, so small that it made Maria want to sob even seeing them, ran a hand through her hair in an imitation of what Maria would do when she was stressed. She didn't know if the girl knew what the motion was, only that it was something one did when they were upset. 

“I need to talk about my dad,” Came forth from her eventually, a tiny voice that only just eked out across the courtroom. The prosecutor nodded, encouraging the girl further. Susan smiled, happy that she had given the right answer.

“Do you know why you need to talk about him?”Here Susan didn’t hesitate. She knew what she needed to say because it was something that had been boiling angrily in her for her entire life. 

“Because, he hurt my mama,” she nearly spat, with a venom that a six year old should not be capable of. And that venom stayed for the remainder of the questions asked to her. Susan loved her mama, and she didn’t want her daddy to hurt her again. Not if she could help it. 

The trial was fairly quick, though the task of finding an unbiased jury had been difficult. That could be blamed on Alexander, his pamphlet painted a picture of Maria as a whore and a vixen, it had been difficult to find people who had not read it yet. Mainly it was the elderly and the disconnected who they had recruited. And those twelve people, those few unbiased souls, would be Maria and Susan’s savior. 

On that day, an hour after they had left the room, at 9:47 PM on a Thursday night, James Reynolds was found guilty of domestic abuse, battery, and child endangerment and neglect, as well as attempted homicide. The sentencing would be later, but by God he was guilty. And that was enough for now. 

Maria broke down at the sentence, sobbing in relief on her knees. It was done, years of torment and abuse and hell was finally over. She was safe now. Her and her girl. He couldn’t hurt them anymore. Susan ran into her arms, clutching onto her tightly. 

“We’re safe now my baby, and it’ll all be okay,” Maria didn’t know if she believed her own words, but the force with which she hugged her daughter was in the hope that she could make Susan believe it. And of course her little Sunshine smiled up at her.

“I know mama. Can we go home?” 

A brick of lead fell into her stomach. How could you try to explain this to a child?

“We can’t go to our home, we’re going to be staying with Miss Elizabeth and Mr Alexander for a bit okay?” Susan’s eyes went wide. She looked around the room nervously.

“Will there be a lot of people there?” Maria almost shook her head, but stopped to consider it for a second.

“Only Mr and Mrs Hamilton and their younger children. They have a son named Alex who’s around your age, so you can play with him,” Of course Maria was just as hesitant as her daughter. It had been so long since Susan had been around people other than Maria and James for an extended period of time, and certainly not kids her own age. But still this had to be done.

“Do you think he likes birds too?” Susan asked, because of course that was her biggest worry. Maria laughed and wiped some of the tears from her face. 

“I’m sure he does,” 

Susan made upwards hand motions and Maria lifted her, making a small grunting noise as she did so. She was starting to be too big to pick up, but Maria would be damned if she stopped anytime soon. 

The walk back to their car after getting the details for when the sentencing hearing would be was a bit awkward, Maria’s slight limping making it hard for her to make it across the parking lot. She was cleared to drive by the doctors but that was basically it, and the car she was driving was borrowed from the Hamiltons, one of four that they owned for them and some of their older kids.

Eliza was waiting for her when she arrived at the Hamilton’s home, a mug of coffee in hand that, when smelled, revealed itself to have more than a generous amount of liquor in it. Gratefully, Maria sat at the table, sweaty hand clenching at her pant leg as she watched Susan run off with Alex Jr. 

“So, let’s talk about getting your stuff back,” Eliza started. Maria curled into herself, she really did not want to ever enter that house again but she couldn’t ask Eliza to do it.

“I can handle that, don’t worry,” she rushed to reassure.

“Oh absolutely not, you aren’t setting foot in that place alone again. Alexander will retrieve your belongings with you. I presume he knows the route?” Maria’s face heated up at the reminder of why the two of them were even connected in the first place, but still she nodded gratefully. 

Tomorrow was going to be a long day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Get ready for some Maria yelling at Alexander next chapter


End file.
